Another First Day ...

Today is my official first day of detox. Not sure what I am feeling yet. Elation in a way that it is all over and I seem to have beaten the virus. But also starting to feel a 'what now' emotion, i.e. having to think about the future. I know it is too early to make firm plans yet, I am still far too confused with too many chemicals swirling around in my blood. But the threatening wall of having to find work again and having to actually leave the house every day is slowly mounting in front of me. Many of my detoxing friends on the forum report a great sadness around about the 2nd or 3rd week. I have thought about this, and it seems to be quite obvious that that will happen. As my answer to a post regarding this topic on the Nomads says:

What we have gone through is massive. Shoving our body full of chemicals, beating the virus, all that fighting before and during tx, physically and mentally. And then what? It's bound to leave a void, which expresses itself in sadness for a while. But I firmly expect that a better, bigger us will emerge in the end, we will be stronger and more assertive, more sure of what we want and more importantly what we dont want! In the meantime, let's embrace the sadness and grieve for everything we have been through, it's a bit like an old mate has died, isnt it?

I know I will have to be patient to come to that point, but I think I will ... I think we ALL will.