Wednesday 26 March 2008

My dauther, the Alien ....

It has happened again. We have fallen out. Over nothing, as usual. Madam going off into a totally unnecessary rant slinging dirt left, right and centre. Trying to ignore her harsh words and forcing myself not to fall into the trap of answering her writings. If she is in this kind of mood, she is not open to reasons. She only hears, what she wants to hear, every word somebody says, is a personal attack on her. This is how it started in the first place. She took something personal, that wasn't even aimed at her. Went into it though all guns blazing. I just find it so pointless, cause the reason for falling out is a computer game. Somehow I managed to question her authority, although my criticism was of her hubby, not her. She is in one of her manic phases at the moment, very similar to January, when they were here. It's the game and nothing but the game, it become all-encompassing and the borders to real life somehow non-existent. In January it didn't concern me, I was just a bystander, quite an immediate one though. Now her moods and actions are pretty similar. But as I said, she doesn't listen to reason. Better not to say anything.

Quotes from the last IM I had from her:
- You're exaggerating completely. You should aim your aggressions at Pete, that's where they belong.
- I don't want your childish comments on this board.
- If you think you have to flee again ... do it.
- Carry on sulking or take a deep breath and sleep over it.
- This is not helping ME.
- It is undermining MY authority in this game.
- 'I' dont like it.

etc etc. It is always about her. I don't need this aggro and I am a bit at a loss of what to do. We seem to be getting along spiffingly as long as I keep my mouth shut. The moment I express some sort of criticism I instantly get this tirade of hatred. I know she isn't very stable mentally, and I do try and take it into account, but surely even I don't have to swallow everything.

I am a bit hurt anyway, I admit that. When she recently went into the day clinic, she phoned every night and I listened to her, willingly and happily. Since I have started treatment, she has phoned twice. All over Easter the game was more important and I was lucky to get a brief IM here and there. And the 2 times we actually managed to speak, 75% was about her anyway. Some times I really feel like I have been taken for a ride :-(

P.S.: Watch out for the next instalment of this blog. It will be about the trials and tribulations of the hepper community and the relentless warfare of one person against a happy little community know as the Nomads.

9 comments:

Me said...

How old is your daughter?

I have similiar problems with my oldest, only we're not really fighting. She just ignores me for the most part unless she thinks I'm dying, or unless I send her gifts. It IS very heart-breaking to a parent.

I keep thinking it must be the age. Mine is 20, nearly 21. How old is yours?

pixie said...

Fishy I know its hard but this must be your time....Does she know what the tx does and its sides..?..Have you sat her down and explained...I would hate to think of you falling out so early in the game...Was it really over a internet game..?...Lol sorry had to do that...Keep your cool if you can you can always rant at me or on the Nomads...Perhaps its best to keep contact at a mininum at the moment....

Looking forward to you next update..PXX

Anonymous said...

Hey Fishter,
don't let it get you down hun, kids are selfish whatever their situation. She knows she can say whatever she wants and you'll still be there for her, and she probably doesn't like it that instead of you being her rock, she needs to be yours!! They don't like that shift in equilibrium, does their little heads right in lol.

My Other Blog said...

If she's not helping you through this treatment, and you're worried about HER and how she's feeling, then she's stealing energy from you and you can't afford to lose that right now.

Changedit said...

marsha, my daughter is 29, married with child. I truly believed her to be an adult.

Thanks for comments all, and right as usual :-)

More to come finally on the weekend. Be there or be square LOL

Fishy x

MartinB said...

I look forward to the next exciting issue with baited breath.

someone said...

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

Warmest regards Fishy... jb xx

Anonymous said...

Hey Fishy,
there are people in this world that just aren't worth the air we breathe. Hope treatment isn't getting you down today, you know you have my support, and whatever reasons other people have to harrass a person on treatment, you know that you have a whole bunch of friends that support you.

Nikki xx

Unknown said...

Hey Fishy...I got one of those Daughter things to, she's 20...We fall out tx or not..

Love Betty