So I went for the psychological assessment yesterday. The nice Dr H and I spoke for about 2 hours ... with a hospital fire alaram and evacuation in between. Gave me the chance for a sneaky fag hehe. All in all it was a good meeting, he took me serious and when we discussed what he would report back to the Hep Team, he said that he wouldnt like to lay my whole life bare, but that he would put that due to my life experiences (yes, we talked about abuse and rapes) I am extremely sensitive to pain of all kinds. I thought that was a very charming way of putting it. He will send me a copy of the report, so I will see what it ACTUALLY says. He assured me that in his opinion I have left the BPD behind me a long time ago and am just battling with coping with this cruel world now, which occasionally results in panic attacks and mild depresseion. Wayyy heyy, maybe I am not so crazy after all. Just a battered and bruised survivor from a bad life. He was also suggesting that maybe some counselling would be good to build my confidence up. When I said, I couldnt afford it, he said there are ways around that. I am meeting him again on 29th April and we will discuss then and see how the 'I dont give a shit' pills are working. At the moment I think they are making me a bit rattley and restless, but hopefully that will settle. Dr H thought they will make me sleepy, but I always react contrary to expectations :-)
Now I will go and sort this Job Centre business out. The cheek of them. Sending me a letter which didnt arrive in time and then saying, that I didnt get the papers back in time. Oh they drive me nuts!!! Luckily I have the paperwork to prove my statements, so I think they will find I am in the right! Or else ....
4 weeks PCR and meeting with Hep Nurse tomorrow. 4 weeks gone already. I can hardly believe it. Feels like I started yesterday. Gosh, how time flies, when you're having FUN!!! Oh yeah, and Mr Hell is in for a bashing tomorrow too. I am getting quite good at this.
2 comments:
sounds like you have a good hep team. Good to have someone to talk to. The tx has brought out issuses for me and maybe its that way for others. We are only human....seems to me you have some bad issues to deal with that aren't your fault. hugs...h.heart
How you feeling with the sides now? Send me m if you have time
Carina they take a while to work but really helped me , just want to give you a big hug
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